Monday, May 7, 2012

A New Study asks an Old Question: Can Men & Women be "Just Friends"?

It's the age-old question, can men and women really just be friends?


The disputed 'When Harry met Sally' conundrum seems to always go back to the problem of attraction. A news study says that though these platonic relationships are plausible,  there is nearly always a portion of attraction between male and female friends. 


And if some guys wonder why they seem to hear the line "I just want to be friends" or " I think we're better off as friends" more than their female counterparts its because men report more sexual interest in their female friends than their female friends do in them and men are more likely to overestimate how romantically  interested their friends are in them.


Lead author in the study, April Bleske-Rechek says that although men and women want to be friends and have platonic relationships, that data she has collected shows that attraction can get in the way. 


April and her researchers sent questionnaires to 107 young adults asking whether they thought their cross-sex friendships were beneficial or burdensome- the results?


"Everyone was very positive about these friendships, ranking them as overwhelmingly beneficial."


However beneficial these friendships might be, attraction was named as an interference when it came to the relationships 5-times more than it was said to be a benefit and the more attracted someone was to a friend, the lower their satisfaction with their romantic partner. 


So what do we learn from this study? 


I can't help but think of the old Jimmy Soul song, " If you wanna be happy"...


If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you


I know the concept may be a little different.. but bottom line.. girls are much better at having platonic friendships with men than men are.. and if your guy has a "best girl-friend" who looks like the next Kate Upton either keep your eye on her or tell him to get uglier girlfriends. 



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