The Title Game: Use Your Words Wisely

Guys are never easy to read, so if you have a burning question you've been dying to ask but are too afraid to, what do you do? 


In continuing with the relationship title topic.. I asked a group of guys to explain what a girl should and should not say when you broach the question of your relationship status. 


If you HAD to have the conversation with a girl you DID like and DIDN’T want to lose, What is the best way she could bring up the “what are we/ title conversation”?


ANSWER: I think people stray away from honesty too often and try to hide stuff. Guys and girls both. If you’re that serious about someone you shouldn’t be afraid to be upfront with what you're doing/thinking.


ANSWER: No reason for convo, the girl will know when she hits gf status.


ANSWER: Trick question there is no Best way. But IF it HAD to be done, don't do it in front of the guys friends or family. You will get a half-ass answer, awkward silence from those in the audience, a pissed off guy when you are finally alone, and a delayed engagement ring.


ANSWER: If you are really into a girl and she is really into you, you normally don’t have to have that discussion its just known and felt. It will come up casually.


ANSWER: She should just straight out ask.  If I liked her enough to not want to lose her, I'd rather she just be honest instead of playing games. 



 What’s the worst thing a girl could say when trying to figure out if they are more to you than just a fling or someone you casually care about?

ANSWER: If you find out the answer to this let me know. I’m always the one trying to make the step from casual to serious too fast. 

ANSWER: Saying "I'm pregnant". Never never cool. Never. 

ANSWER: Asking about other girls I hang out with.

ANSWER: Any type of ultimatum or ordering in general.

ANSWER: If after one sleepover she tells you she thought about her husband leaving to go to work and she is referring to you. THAT IS A DEAL BREAKER… also talk about how you are such a great couple in front of your friends when you have hung out just a few times. Unlike girls, guy’s don’t like to talk about their feelings with other dudes, so if you assume something in front of his friends you might as well get your things because you are gone.

The Title Game: Are You His Girlfriend or Not?

We already know guys don't like talking about their feelings, but why is it that once your dating  your never really sure if your his girlfriend or not? You'd hate to be "that girl" and ask the big ugly question " what are we".. but if you don't and surely they won't how will you ever know?


Girls have battled with this problem since the 60's when asking to go steady was like asking someone to prom. So to shed some much needed light into the cluttered and complicated minds of men, I consulted with a group of guys from all walks of life. Some are single and some are not, some are happily single and some are not, some are happily committed and some are not...a well-rounded array of perspectives.. only the best for my reader.

In a relationship, when is it acceptable for a guy or a girl to bring up the  “what are we” conversation?

a)      After 2 dates

b)      after you sleep with them more than once

c)       after a month of talking and dating

d)      anytime after 4 months

                  e)      other ( fill in your own response here)

 Results: 

3/6 picked C-after a month of talking and dating

2/6 picked E-other; let the natural progression of a relationship take place

other; Depends on circumstances

Why do guys hate the ‘title’ conversation so much?

Answer: Once there is a 'title', we then need to refer to you by that title, therefore limiting our ability to hook up with other girls.  If we never have that conversation, we can claim that we didn't know it would be an issue that we're seeing other people.  Plausible deniability.

Answer: Guys will never be the first to bring this up. Plus, a guy will continue to see (or try) to see other people until they are cutoff. Guys need negative incentives, girls love positive reinforcement.  Girl gets a haircut, you better notice. I don't ask girls if my biceps look awesome after going to the gym.

Answer: We are guys, we are chemically imbalanced to enjoy the questions because that discussion can result in drama and only G*y guys like drama.

Answer: First off guys don’t want a title because they don’t want the expectations that also come with a title. If they are going on dates and having fun with a girl, they want that to keep up without having to do the other stuff. The second there is a title involved there is a whole different stigma of what is expected.

After a month or two of dating, what signs do men give off that should tell a woman, "were over sleeping with you and now want to walk away”?

a)      You don’t call and text as often

b)      You have two days off in a row and you don’t talk to her at all

c)       The last time you hung out with her you didn’t make plans to see her next (even if your job schedule is different or busy)

d)      Other 

Results: 

3/ 6 picked A- You don’t call and text as often

2/6 picked D-Other; All of the above

Other; we'll probably just stop calling and texting all together.If you call and ask why, we'll make up some excuse to avoid having to tell the truth.

Stay Tuned for Part 2~